So last week BellaNaija (BN) Weddings posted a topic entitled “Who is the Bride” (in case you missed it, read it here) that some BN fans noted should have been termed “#whoseweddingisitanyways” or “#isityourwedding,” “#waityourturn.” The comments were so hilarious with people chiming their 2 cents not only on the post directly but also on Instagram.
The topic tiself was so hot that some just simply noted that all they wanted are the comments and I couldn’t agree more as the response from people are like soap opera on their own. Now some BN fans were truly sincere and in support of the fact that “no one can ever outshine the Bride,” after all it’s her big day. Other comments were too funny and blamed “#asoebibella for starting the madness.”
All these comments made my day so much so that I decided to relive the moment again with my top 6 insights on this topic, but this time from the comments of BN fans as they are #thebest and honestly (food for thought) Who really is to blame? Are guests taking it too far? Is #asoebibella to blame? My dear read on…
1. Blame it on the Ex: You know when your ex-boyfriend is the groom and you wish him all the happiness, but secretly want him to remember what he would be missing out on as he says “I do”, then @asydarly gets you. She stated the following: “I say unto all ye Bella-lites!!! If na your stupid ex boyfriend’s wedding…Wear it!!!” (too funny) and @groomsinspiration reminded everyone that “even foes attend wedding” (which is so true).
2. Blame it on #Asoebibella trying to outshine the bride (he he he, above meme too funny): Now, what if this trend is caused by BN themselves with it’s #asoebibella, #bellanaijaweddings. “Yes BN, you are part of the wahala ooh” (as noted by Steph). It was even stated (by bee) that “#asoebibella is helping Naija babes unmask their vanity” (more below), but c’mon admit it, you all know you have sent them your own #outfit hoping it will be featured on the site (no lie, I have done it too).
So the comment by M simply stated: “Bellanaija it’s your fault o. lol. Ok maybe partly so, ever since you brought asoebi bella…ladies have STEPPED UP THEIR GAME. Everyone wants to look good and outshine each other and if that includes the bride, then so be it…Personally I would like to see the person that would try such madness at my wedding and you will tell me if you invited me or I did you…”
3. Blame it on the vanity of our society: jcgrl had this to say: “only in naija will guests be fighting to outshine each other and the bride. Everything is a completion. Imagine guests saying “oh she looks ok.” Na wa o! Unnecessary pressure for brides to go to the highest mountains to make sure they are winning on that day instead of focusing on their marriage.”
4. Blame it on the cost of being an aso-ebi girl/woman: Now granted if you have ever received the news that a friend is getting married, truth be told, be prepared to spend your own money like as if it’s your big day to shine also. So no wonder mrschidukane had this to say:” Girls are trying way too hard. There’s nothing wrong with being well dressed at a wedding but some girls spend so much and this should be discouraged…they spend plenty money to buy asoebi, 5k on makeup, 10k on shoe and bag, 15k on beaded jewelry and 3k on cab to get there when there is no guarantee that your market will even sell” (he he he, this had me laughing so hard) but her comments were wise and she encouraged ladies to even learn to be wise with how they spend their money and try to look good on a budget (sound advice)
6. But Why Not (this comment, no name just “but why not,” fit cause whahala no be small-but I can relate ooh-what’s wrong with looking like Keke Palmer above): “Personally, I don’t see what’s wrong with being well dressed for a wedding whatever “well dressed” may mean for each individual…If I want to wear a ball gown, I will. I’m not trying to steal any show. I just have certain standards for how I look when I go to events. I won’t judge you if you wear something frumpy that I would never be seen in, so don’t judge me for being fabulous.”
Now I know I only choose comments that #blameothers. But I must confess that the question posed by BN did generate some sincere thoughts about the bride and how really “no one can outshine” her and I really couldn’t agree more. It’s her big day and no matter what anyone tries to do, all eyes are on her. Her confidence, her joy, her glow cannot be surpassed by any guest.
In fact as a recent bride (see my own image below although a sneak peak, so keep following for more on my big day later), I can honestly say that there is this inner joy, peace and calmness that comes from within you that even you cannot explain, nothing would matter, not all your planning or what the guests are wearing, as you will have eyes only for your husband and he will have the same for you.
Enter the comment by Ruth Joseph: “what really makes a bride shine? Is it the dress, the makeup, the shoes? Nooo, it is the confidence and joy that comes from within…” (again, I couldn’t agree more). On the day a man decides to make you his wife in the presence of his family and friends, may no weapon (hahaha, just joking), I mean no guest come against you #inJesusnameiprayamen and even if they try, #whocares, it’s your wedding day, so enjoy it to the fullest!!! Lord knows I did!